Tuesday, March 27, 2007

still here

I wonder if anyone still reads this. No matter. I will again write in here for the reason I started it in the first place. To get feelings out. To makes sense of things. To remember things. To try and forget things.

So many things changed over the last couple of months. It wasn't easy but I made it through. If you know me at all, you SHOULD be proud of me right now. Change is not easy for me. I hit emotional rock bottom and have climbed back up. There are scars and there might be for some time. I learned that people have a very hard time seeing the difference between mad and SAD and then I learned that some people just don't care about either.

On the resolution, it's going well and that helps the other.

Eric tells me all the time that I am his hero and that makes me happier than I could ever explain. His sense of humor is developing almost as fast as his speech is improving and I'm thrilled about both.

Brendan is very emotional. He gets frustrated and cries and I can't help but wonder if it's what's going on, or his age, or what. We will work this out, he responds to calm conversation. I hope that's what I'm supposed to do.

Katie is my savior. I know she gets angry with me and I can take that. She is really going through alot and I try not to add anything to it. She brought up her grades, she helped the varsity cheerleaders of Wooster High win first place at the Waynedale competition. She is going to prom. It's all very impressive. I hope she is as impressed with herself as I am with her. I know she's not...but she SHOULD be.

I found out a friend that lives very far away may be coming to visit in August. I almost cry every time I think about it. She is one of those friends that help you no matter what you've gotten yourself into. She is so smart and knows what to say every time. She picks you up, she makes you feel better, she inspires..yes inspires. She makes ya laugh, she makes you think and I've never EVER met her. I can't wait to hug her and thank her in person, for all she has done for me.

I reconnected with a friend that I feared I lost forever. I met her over 24 years ago and I hope that she knows that I'll always be here for her.

School is....school. The semester will end soon and I'm taking the summer off. I want to be done NOW. I want to move on and do new and YES, make changes. wow.

75 degrees here today. It's about freakin time. It helps.

I guess when the subject turns to the weather, you know it's time to end the conversation.

Bye for now.

1 Comments:

Blogger mrstrace said...

Yes, I'm still reading. I've almost commented on your last post a few times to ask if everything was ok but I figured you were just too busy to blog.

IS everything ok? I hope so.

Gotta run, but I'll keep checking back. Take care of yourself.

5:51 AM  

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